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jokes of the day:
Force a man to do sit-ups:
Q: What is the best way to force a man to do sit-ups?
A: Put the remote control between his toes.
~ ~ ~
What is Sex?:An 8-year-old girl went to her dad, who was working in the yard. She asked him, 'Daddy, what is sex?'
The father was surprised that she would ask such a question, but decides that if she is old enough to ask the question, then she is old enough to get a straight answer.
He proceeded to tell her all about the 'birds and the bees'. When he finished explaining, the little girl was looking at him with her mouth hanging open. The father asked her, 'Why did you ask this question?'
The little girl replied, 'Mom told me to tell you that dinner would be ready in just a couple of secs.'
~ ~ ~
Come judgement day:Everybody on earth dies and goes to heaven. The Lord comes and says "I want the men to make two lines. One line for the men that dominated their women on earth and the other line for the men that were dominated by their women. Also, I want all the women to go with St Peter."
Said and done, the next time The Lord looked the women are gone and there are two lines. The line of the men that were dominated by their women was 100 miles long, and in the line of men that dominated their women, there was only one man. The Lord got mad and said, "You men should be ashamed of yourselves. I created you in my image and you were all whipped by your mates. Look at the only one of my sons that stood up and made me proud. Learn from him! Tell them my son, how did you manage to be the only one in this line?"
And the man replied, "I don't know, my wife told me to stand here"
~ ~ ~
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